A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

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Knock Knock Knockin on heavens door..

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A bus crashes and everybody dies.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Dead.

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

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You know what I am gonna come up with that could potentially make me millions of dollars? An idea that could potentially make me millions of dollars.

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Q- what did the magician say after the sawed the woman in half ? A- call an ambulance !

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A man walks into a convenient store and asks the cashier where the toilet paper is. She says aisle five. He goes down aisle five and there's no toilet paper.

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Q-What happens when you grow tomatoes in Kansas on an odd number year when its an average of 398degrees Kelvin ? A-You eat em

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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How do you drown a blond girl? Forcibly hold her head under water until it enters the lungs and prevents the absorption of oxygen leading to cerebral hypoxia and myocardial infarction.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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Why did George Bush climb the Statue of Liberty? I'm not sure, as this incident is not covered in any of the myriad books written about his administration.

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was drunk.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because I took a swing at it with a golf club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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