What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than a dead baby? A baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should? Fly halfway across the world when the environment turns hostile.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do u get an A on your test. U lock your teacher in the closet.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Who kille the Mockingbird? George Bush: i wish i could know the answer for this question, but belive me i am thinking.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the Christian say to the atheist? "Even though we don't share the same beliefs, I think it's great that we can still be good friends."

thumb_up thumb_down -9

*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I man was taking a major shiit He forgot to wipe

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Ring Ring Hello? Click

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There are two blonds in a car, the driver to looks to the other blond (carelessly taking in her surroundings) They crash and the passenger is grusomely killed to the point of not being recognized and the driver later commits suicide from the guilt and pending law suit.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

CIA? You? Are you a CIA agent? Wow!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Sir, your wife is dead

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops