- Anti Joke

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

A women in the kitchen.

What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

How do you put in a lightbulb? Call your local electrition

Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

I dig, you dig, we dig, they dig, he digs, she digs, everybody digs. Guys, it's not a very profound poem, but it's deep.

Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

You- I came up with a new word! Friend- What is it? You- Plagiarism.

How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? ...You mean, you don't know?

Why cant white guys jump? Well that would be wrong because some can. Have you seen Blake Griffen?

Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

How many men does it take to change a light bulb? One.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

Why couldn't Billy write his own name... ...because he was wearing purple lemonade???

What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

Why did the chicken rape your...wait, that's not how it goes!