What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should? Fly halfway across the world when the environment turns hostile.

If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

How do u get an A on your test. U lock your teacher in the closet.

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

What did the Christian say to the atheist? "Even though we don't share the same beliefs, I think it's great that we can still be good friends."

CIA? You? Are you a CIA agent? Wow!

Dyslexic drunk died choking on his own vimto last night

What do you get when you cross black man and a Hispanic woman A child that is a combination of both ethnic groups

I man was taking a major shiit He forgot to wipe

Who kille the Mockingbird? George Bush: i wish i could know the answer for this question, but belive me i am thinking.

Ring Ring Hello? Click

This is not funny.

What's worse than a dead baby? A baby.

What did the lawyer name his daughter? Amanda.

Why did to plane crash because the pilot was a tomato

Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

A fat guy!

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

roses are red leather is black when god made you he was smoking crack

You know what they say about people with big feet? Big shoes.

What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

Why did the monkey die? he was stapled to a grenade

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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