How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

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this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He is suicidal and should probably get help.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Actually a better question would be, why is the chicken near a road in the first place?

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What did Hitler say to the Nazis? I have a mustache.

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What's the difference between an apple and a fruit? None

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penis?

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your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

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What do you call a black man wearing tights? Rick

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What animal wouldn't you want to play games with? Probably none of them. They are animals and incapable of playing board games.

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Why didnt little Timmy come home? He was abducted into slavery.

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One night, a man was bitten by Dracula. The first thing to come out of his mouth was "Joke's on you, I have AIDS!" Then proceeded to laugh hysterically until Dracula snapped his neck

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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What's worse than sex with a midget? Non-consensual sex with a midget.

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To pick up the remains of the thousands of his friends that lost their lives to this joke.

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What types of animals are the most dangerous? Dangerous ones.

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What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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