Yo mammas so fat you know what, i think she might die!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was the kid sitting in a wooden chair? Because at the early age of four he was diagnosed with cancer and genital warts!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how do you make a baby cry? you throw a brick at it's face!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

23

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Burp

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

thumb_up thumb_down +7

your mothers so blonde she has yellow hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What happened when the man turned on his TV? It was tuned to the Discovery Channel

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's 9 + 10 19 AB

thumb_up thumb_down +7

a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is the difference between a bitch and your ex-girlfriend? First of all, they are two different types of mammals. Second, dogs don't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why Did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops