Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

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What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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Knock Knock? Come in.

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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How do you confuse a blonde?? Throw her in a circle room and tell her to find all the corners If she comes out and says I found the corners.. then your screwed

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Want to know a joke? There is no joke.

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What's worse than waking up with a clown in your bed? Waking up with a dead clown in your bed.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live on at the bottom.

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How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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Do you still got what it needs to become a better leader than me Nero?

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I was jacking off I don't use my hand tho, I just use my gf's vagiina

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What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

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Wait! hundred billions!

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Golgo12 here, I can see how some people consider you insane Nero, glad to know point zero is the starting ground of your elysum, that should show them how a modern society should be like. You got six years left to live? That sucks man sorry to hear that. Ur real name is Nero? Axel Knight sounds so much more... You.

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

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How do you know when some one is a complete dick? When they hit the prestige buttom in Black Ops when your taking a dump. N.P.P.

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What do you call a mexican and a African? Two people with no water.

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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HEY YOU! TISSUE!

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why is andreas making a pizza? since he dosent get laid he likes the feeling of the sauce stinging on his dick

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Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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