How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally raped and murdered 8,9,10, and 11 along with their families.

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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What's funnier than 24? Nothing, 24 is just a number. There's is nothing humorous about it. Go away.

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What does a blonde say when she wants to order a large pizza ? "Hi, I would like a large pizza, please."

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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Whats wrong with me? Your alive.

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Apirl showers bring... Tornadoes that kill families

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Jackie Chan walks into a bar.

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I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

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What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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Why did the kid drop his football? He had a heart attack

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What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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