Why did the astronaut die in space? Just kidding there was no astronaut. It was a cucumber

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Why was the guy coverd in garbage. I don't know but their are a lot of homeless people that can't afford the good stuff.

when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

Whats funnier than 24.....25

Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

Me and a pig had sex, beastieality.

Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

What's the difference between a horse and a house? 1 letter.

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

What did the man say to the young, blond athletic girl walking by? "Hi."

a horse walks into a bar, hours later it walks out on two legs and the man who saw it all happen couldn't believe his eyes. The man then turns to the bartender and says, "I theenk eye've had enuf, Cut me hoff!"

Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...