I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

Please don't shoot me

Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

Why was the girl sad? Because borat came had DA SEXI TIME with yo mother in law:)

How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

Your momma's so fat that she went on a diet.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house?!?! Neither has he

what did the black guy ge for christmas? a speeding ticket

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

Whats green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...