Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

A high school student finally gets the nerve to ask his long-time crush on a date. They begin dating, and eventually settle down and get married. After six months of marriage, she dies in a car crash and he spends years in therapy.

what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

What did the snowman put on his head? Nothing; snowmen are inanimate.

Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

69 :) 3====D:). [{}]:)

Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

A black duck walks into a bar. Duck: "I'll have a beer." Bartender: " How you paying for that?" Duck: "Put it on the tax payers."

what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

your goin down...aint no tomorrow...wha bang bang

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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