A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind, which both make it very unsafe for her to drive.

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My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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Jimmy clenches his fist, a crack his heard. Jimmy begins to cry knowing his arthritis has gotten worse.

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Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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A guy went to a girl asked if she wanted to have sex with him. She said yes and they promptly had sex.

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what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

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How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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oh hai i'm al gore reduce ur carbon footprint lolz

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A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

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9

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Fat people

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Hey, do you want to play the rape game ? NO! That's the spirit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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