penis

why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

Q: Did you know Hellen Kellers father was a skilled craftsman? A: Neiter did she.

What's grey and can't fly? A castle

Poker? I barely even know her.

whats black, then white, then dead all over? Michael jackson

Two cows are out in a field grazing. One falls over and dies because it was unhealthy and was ravaged with a deadly disease. The other cow, which does not understand death, continues to graze until the farmer moves it back to the barn.

Your mom is so dumb that she had a below average score on her IQ test.

Thank you for flying Buzzy Fly Airlines. Today we'll be flying around Uranus.

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

A princess kisses a frog to aquire a prince.. then gets arrested for beastiality.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Cancer.

what did the banana say to the orange? nothing because a banana is a fruit

What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

A guy walks into a bar

What is the difference between a horse? All the legs are of same length, especially the back ones.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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