What is wet, white and sticky? Glue, of course.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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Why'd Carly fall off the swing? She got hit by a bus

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why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

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What do you call it when a dead man has his wallet stolen? Rob Zombie.

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

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What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

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Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

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knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

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PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

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Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am colorblind I hate my life

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

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Three men were lost in a desert when a genie appeared and granted them each a wish. they died of dehydration shortly afterward, never realizing they were hallucinating.

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Why didn't the chef serve the black guy his food? Because he wasn't a waitor.

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Two kids walk into a bar and get arrested for underage drinking.

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How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops