What's a Mexican's favourite sport? Cross-country running.

what do you call a black person who flies a plane? a pilot, you racist

What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

If you have a stroke, call 000

Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

What do you get when you stab Al with a sword? At

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a person of the jewish faith and a pizza is delicious food.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

im typing this without looking at the jetviard. I can;t toycg type thar wekk yet

Why did the chicken cross the road? We can never be truly sure of the chicken's real purpose, but given the circumstances of the surroundings, the story has it that the purpose of the chicken was to physically move to the other side of said road.

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with his friend that was on the other side.

Whats the difference between a house and a mouse If you think about it , quite a lot really

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? What? I don't have a Corvette in my garage Wanna hear something gross? Sure. 1 at the bottom is still alive. Wanna hear something grosser? Yea. It's eating its way out

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Not from my wife if that is what you think, but its best people dont know who she is, because you know... A guy that gets many ladies = A playa. A girl that lets his guy do that, well, my wife feels safe about her husband (I am dead honest), but I cant expect people to suddenly go "oh yeah, his wife is totally cool and secure about it all, rather than an insecure idiot that allows him to sleep around like the dog he is) Strictly spoken, I am no dog, women say all men are pigs, but no woman settles for a boy, so that makes me a pig.

Roses are red Pickles are green I leik ur legs and whats inbetween

What's the difference between cat and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other is a watermelon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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