Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

What's more annoying than dyslexic jokes? Jokes were peopel spel words rong.

How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

A baby seal walks into a club.

How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

What long black and tasty? Licorice

Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

Why didn't the boy answer the phone when it was ringing? Because he had no arms to pick it up.

What did the pirate say to the ninja? I have aids.

How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

Do you know what's hilarious? Not rape.

What do you call a guy with no arms? Names.

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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