Hey diddle diddle, the cat and the fiddle, the cow jumped over the salamander, macaroni and cheese

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A women left the kitchen.

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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your mama's so fat... that's it

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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What did the penguin say to the peacock? Die, you homosexual!

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I asked her where you were.

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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Boy: Hey girl, the voices in my head tole me to come over and talk to you. Girl: ... *walks away*

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A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

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I was relaxing on the beach today when a fat bird came over and said, "Would you rub this lotion into my back please?" "I'm afraid I'm only here for the day," I replied.

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Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

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What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

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I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

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Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

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What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

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Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

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knock knock... ....... no one replies.. the family is deff..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops