Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

What is worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Obama

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut, you ***ing racist.

how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

What's faster than a black man running with a VCR? His son with the receipt of purchase as they realize VCR's are clearly outdated and must be returned right away.

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? One. I don't see why there should be more.

Sigh... I gotta go to night class studies okay?

Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

whats the difference between a black guy and pizza? a pizza can feed a family.

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

What do you call a black person flying an airplane? The pilot.

Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

Suzie has no arms. Knock Knock (whos there?) Not Suzie.

a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

This is funny.

A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

Women's Professional _________

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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