why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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How can a man go 8 days without sleeping? Sleep at night.

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What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

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What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

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1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

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Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

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Female Orgasms

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How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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How many black people does it take to change a light bulb? None. While they were figuring out who to change the bulb the bulb lit a spark and the house caught fire. Everyone but one died. The black guy couldn't change the bulb because the bulb was lost in the fire.

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A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

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A Mexican, Asian, and a black guy are on a bridge, the Mexican says there is too much rice and throws some off the bridge, the Asian says there are too many burritos and throw some off the bridge, the Black says there are too many candles in his house and throws his car off the bridge. Everyone was happy and left besides the Black because he threw his car off.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To pick up the carcass of its road-killed younger brother and weep.

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Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

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What do you call an earthquake on Mars? There is not enough water on planet Mars for something like that to happen.

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What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

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So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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What do you call a nun in a wheelchair? Virgin mobile XD

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Why did the blonde girl lie? Because she's a liar.

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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ask me what my temperpedic bed is like. ''whats it like?'' i dont know ive never had one actully.

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What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

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what did Dr. Dre say? Nothing you idiots! Dr. Dre's dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops