Your mother is overweight. This is largely due to her sedentary lifestyle.

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Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Fairy floss" "Fairy floss who?" "I'm sugar coating your Cancer diagnoses"

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how do you save a black man ... u don't

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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What was sandusky's role at penn state turned tight ends into wide receivers

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knock knock who's there your moms dead im sorry

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas?? - Cancer

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Q. Why did my ass feel so sweaty? A. Because i was exercising and suckn on some nips.

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Two guys walk into a bar. But the third one was a duck.

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Hey ask me if i'm a train? Are you a train? No...

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Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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1: I know a lot of people hate Mondays, but my least favorite day of the week is Thursday. 2: Can I ask why? 1: Of course you can. Everyone has free will.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

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Why does it take more than one squirrel to change a light bulb Why? Because they're so darn stupid

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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What did the pitcher say to the batter who hit the ball very far? Wow, you hit that ball very far.

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What happened to the child who was rushed into hospital with a deadly disease? He pulled through. I'ts depressing to be constantly hearing sad anti jokes, so here is a nice one. The child in question lived to eighty one, had a great life and a good job. See, it's nice to read a happy anti joke!

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Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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