a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

How did poor Miss Suzy get her poor little baby to stop crying? She cut off its head, burned its body, and sacrificed its ashes in a bizarre Satanic ritual that involved having sex with a heifer. (Miss Suzy was a Satanist priestess.)

Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

your mom is so stupid she got raped

is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

CAOIMHIN. IVE BEEN DOING MY WORK SINCE IVE STARTED THIS CLASS. YOU'VE STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. I WROTE BIG MAC'S AND THATS IT. SO STFU

Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

why did the woman get electricuted? because there was an electric fence around the kitchen.

Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian food that is an American favorite, and the other is a follower of Judaism.

A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

What's the difference between celery and a truck?

How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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