A Jew and a Muslim are playing golf. Just not together.

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

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69.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

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What do you call a guy with an ax in his chest? An ambulance.

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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How do you find out the population of Mexico? The census.

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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