whats a bike and rhymes with mike?

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

Why was the mom happy cause her daughter had an abortion

A blond is walking down the street when she is suddenly mugged and raped. She reports her attacker but he is never found.

Knock Knock Who's There Me

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. Imams do not drink alcohol so this joke has a logical flaw.

Bob Saget that is all

I love you

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause you touch yourself at night;

yo momma so ugly that yo your birth certifiicate is an apology from thew condem factory

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because goats lay eggs.

- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

A white man, a black man, and a woman are drinking in the local pub. The black man and the woman are hanged. Medieval European pubs did not permit either.

twenty three roaches walk into a bar. the bar is evacuated due to insects.

I used to be an adventurer like you, but then I was raped by a giant scorpion...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...