Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

why was the black guy running from the cops? i dont know either

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

wormly wormly sat on the worm theworm said wormly and went to warmly

Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

What happens when three drunk men are driving 80 miles off of a cliff. They all die on impact from the great fall and their family's mourn over their deaths for years to come.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go hang himself.

I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

There is a boy in a school............. SUDDENTLY, PEDOBEAR APPEARS!

What's your favorite Sylvia Plath quote? "Turn on the oven."

Why isn't this a joke? Because it's not.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

What did the Rose Bowl say to the Fiesta Bowl? We crushed the Orange Bowl.

Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

If Santa's not real, then who pees on the tree every morning?

You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

What's bloody and has wheels? The Holocaust I lied about the wheels.

How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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