A Muslim, a Buddhist, and a Christian are on a plain. They have to jump off for some reason. The Muslim straps a bomb to his chest, jumps out of the plain, and screams "AHLA AKBAH"!!!! The Buddhist jumps out and says save me heavenly Buddha. A giant golden hand catches him and lightly places him on land. The Christian says "aw hell with this" and jumps out, then says "save me heavenly Buddha". The giant golden hand places him down gently on land. The Christian then says "thank god". The giant golden hand comes back down and kills him.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

thumb_up thumb_down

A cowboy rides out to the middle of nowhere and then shoots his horse. He then makes his way back into town and meets a man in the saloon. The man says, "On second thought, I'd like to buy that horse."

thumb_up thumb_down

What is long, hard and comes out of a gay persons bum? poo

thumb_up thumb_down

What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q:How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: Well, we can solve this problem of the wood chuck chucking our wood by putting all of your spare wood in a wood chipper. Try throwing dust you chucking bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down

why is a peanut butter and jelly sandwich the same as a tub of fish? they are both food

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: How do get a person to leave you alone ? A: Suck out his eye-balls stuff them in your ears to muffle the sound of his screaming as you head-butt him into a fine paste. Then proceed to spread or squeeze sed paste on to delicious food substance and eat sed delicious food substance. Then carry on with the rest of your day like nothing happened. (P.S. Just ignore any letters about court cases or arrests)

thumb_up thumb_down

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down

Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

thumb_up thumb_down

roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

thumb_up thumb_down

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

thumb_up thumb_down

What happened When The lion asked the dog of a soda can? The giraffe who is taller the lion or the whos the fastest?

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. Whats Red and yellow and has braces? A.Pierre-Louis

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is Skrillex so bad a fishing? He has Parkinson's Disease

thumb_up thumb_down

So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

thumb_up thumb_down

Colin Fry backwards is yrF niloC

thumb_up thumb_down

Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the duck with one leg say to the pirate? Woof.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

person 1: hey! guess what? person 2: what? person 1: i once saw a brown polar bear

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops