Stephen Hawking

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why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

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I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

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How do you eat a candy cane? Shove it in your mouth and chew.

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Red sky in the morning, Shepard's warning. Red sky at night, Shepard's Fulcrum.

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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When life gives you lemons Unless it gives you sugar, water, and a cup your lemonade will suck

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Q: My hands are queefing vaginas A: Milk isn't wearing underwears

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why is pie good. because it just is.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Ben." Ben who?" "Ben Dover!" "Ben,it's been 7 years. I already moved on and have a new husband and family. Stop coming here or I'm calling the police."

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer was depressed about the low business and farmer's economy, so he poured gasoline all over himself and lit a match. The barn burned down and the chicken was the only survivor.

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A scantily dressed woman is standing at an intersection. She is a prostitute.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Easter? A: Diabetes

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Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

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Why did the basketball team from Detroit win the youth championship? Because they had a good coach amd dedicated, hard-working players.

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why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

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David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

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roses are red violets are blue pornhubs down your mums facebook will do.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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