Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

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what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

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Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

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What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

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What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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i like it in the mouth

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

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when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

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aodhan hearty

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-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

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What do you call a Ku Klux Klan member who has been set on fire? Burnt Marshmallow.

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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What is holocaust victim's favorite food? Hamburgers.

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why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

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Knock knock, "Whos there" a business man who wants to sell you things that you don't need "Oh, go away"

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

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y did simran cros rode? 2 get 2 uder side ofcurse. stopid nobs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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