Why is Easter better than christmas? Theres a significantly less chance of getting raped by a man in a Santa Claus costume.

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

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A guy is at a party and he's really thirsty, so he goes to get a drink. He goes to get some soda, but the line is too long. He goes to get some water, but the line is also too long. He goes to get some punch, and it turns out there's no punch line.

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Knock Knock whos there? brad are you thomas brad are you thomas who? for goodness are you a parot or something

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Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -Because he was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? -He was stapled to the first one Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? -He thought it was a game Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? -He had no arms Why did the girl fall off her bike? -She was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. Except when I said muffins I meant Jews. .. I guess it really isn't that funny anymore.

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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What do you call a horse with bread on its ears? Boris, because that's his name.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

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What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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Knock Knock Who's There? Jehovah's Witness

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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