Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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What's worse than being swallowed by a blue whale? Being swallowed by a bule whale with herpes.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Do you know why I am excited? I don't know I'm asking you.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo Boo who? I don't have a last name, it's just Boo

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can extrapolate from incomplete data

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Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

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Adam eats ginger nuts the fookin chicken

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What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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Once upon a time, The end.

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

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When life gives you carrots, don't make carrot juice, because it's gross.

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

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why was the black kid so good at basketball because he practiced a lot

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops