A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

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What happens when you turn the TV on? You watch it.

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What is the black stuff between elephants toes? Slow natives

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Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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Q: what's your dog's name ? A: Dog.

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

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What do you call a cat that plays football? Weird.

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What was the babies first word? Nothing: It was a still-born.

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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I like U.............................nicorns :D

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How to pick up chicks Pick up a chicken but must be a baby

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I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

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Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

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Women's rights

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Roses are red, Violets are rare because of the irreversible damage to our ecosystem in recent years.

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What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

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Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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whats worse than 2 jews 3 jews

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Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

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What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops