Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Hurr durr, I shit my pants.

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How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

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on a scale from 0 to 100, how childish are you? 69

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Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

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Why couldn't the teenager go to the pirate movie? He didn't have any money.

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Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They finally get to Florida and they see a sign that says "Disneyworld: left" so they take the left and get hit by a semi and all die.

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What did the cow say to the butcher? At least I'm not a Jew.

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What did Pablo experience during his first day in private school? the atmosphere of a private school

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What human can fly without holding any thing (exept cloths i dont like inapropeate jokes i dont know it a very intresting quesiton

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View Terms of Service

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

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Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

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poop.

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a police woman who shaves her pubes? PC Marion Jones

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so a man goes to jurrasic park and sees two dinosaurs fighting. he shits himself.

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What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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