What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

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If you took all the veins in your body and laid them end to end, you would die.

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What's the difference between a chicken and a 3 legged dog? There are numerous differences. I will not however go into the biological explanations of these differences.

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...The new series of spinoff movies from the worlds most frightening franchise! Pretty Normal Activity: Doing the groceries *****-Did not scare me at all :D! Ballbusters movie rentals *****- The demon never showed up which made this the scariest movie ever! Could not sleep for months... Whatyumean there is nothing paranormal in this? Aww FU*beep*CK!! Sumgay Inthestreet Journal *****-Pissed myself just from hearing the title got a stroke and almost died!, was it another Paranormal movie you said? Most overhyped comment we could find. Goddamn exaggerated movie reviews that fooled me into buying the original and expect something actually scary :(

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A dog walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "What can I get for you?" The dog replies "1 beer please." shocked at the dogs English the bartender sprints out of the bar in terror

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A guy walks into a bar. He has a couple beers, gets in his car and goes home. He got arrested on the way because it is illegal to drink and drive.

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What did the priest do to the young catholic boy? Bless him.

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what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

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Yo mamma's so short that she is 12 inches below the average height of a woman at her age.

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

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What happened to the kid who brome his neck? He died.

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What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

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why didn't the mexiczn eat the black man's cooking? because it wasn't good

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my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

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Yo momma's so fat she weighs more than the average woman of her age and height

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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