I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

What's black and blue and hates sex? The unfortunate child in a pedophile's basement who the police have yet to find.

Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

Why did the 18 year old girl take her clothes off? To take a shower

Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

A Mexican, a Jew, an American and an Indian are on a plane with no parachutes. No one jumps out because no one has a parachute.

What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie!

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

What did the man say to his wife. Hi

Why is the ground wet It rained

If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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