i like turtles

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 for violence and brief nudity.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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Why was the dentist sent to jail? Because he committed a crime.

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Why did the little boy fall of his bike? He was dead.

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What did the amputee get for Christmas? Shot.

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Why does a man have a closet full of fruits? Because he has a mental illness and there is nothing to laugh about.

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Dad: sussy, do you know how you were made? Sussy: No, how? Dad: With this DICK!!

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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Why did the little girl's pet bunny pass away? Because her neighbor ripped out it's vitals.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The holocaust

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what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Nick Oh hi Nick come in

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How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

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there was a rich kid strolling in the woods.he saw a bear, HE DIED

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How do you stop a bus? You press the brake pedal, causing the brake pads to squeeze the tires. Which will slow the momentum of the bus to the point of stopping.

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I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

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A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

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What did the female lady person say to the baby? Get Some.

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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