A man walks in the a bar Now he has 3 missing teeth

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How come Billy can only swim in circles? His right arm and right leg were amputated because he scraped his left arm.

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whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

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What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

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How many blodnes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Approximately 17. with the addition of 6 brunettes.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

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How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house? She didn't either.

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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What's the difference between ?2 and and 74^3? ?-405242.585786

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Rape

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How do you make a baby fit in a bottle? Blender.

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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whats something naked and nailed to a cross? jesus, idiot.

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What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Im a Jew, Fart yourself.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

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Why did the puppy get shot? It lived in Detroit.

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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What did the priest do to the little crying boy in an enclosed room? He forgave the boy for his sins. Then he raped him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops