Sex

What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

Rose's are red, violet's are blue. Rose's die and viloets are more purple.

Do you wanna build a snowman ? No.

What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

On Wednesday night, a drunk man was walking on the cliffs of dover. his funeral was saturday.

Why didn't the Mexican have a job? Because stereotypes made employers unjustly reluctant to hire a hard-working, competent man.

You are in a room with hitler and bin Ladin. You have a gun with 1 bullet. Who do shoot? Don't worry you don't have to make that decision. They are already both dead

How Many polish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, one person is capable of screwing in a light bulb. Unless they were mentally challenged, in which case, they would get someone else to do it for them.

How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

Did you fall on your head when you were a baby Oh, Im very sorry.

Where did Sally go when the bomb went off? Everywhere.

i threw my line in the toilet the fishing was pretty shity that day

what is similar between a turtle losing its shell, and a man selling his chlothes and house? they are now both naked and homeless

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A. Treadmil

Hey dude. who died.... crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets crickets YO MAMA

Roses are red Violets are blue You think you're smart But I've got a plan for you.. Leaves are green Stems are too You lied to me Now I will shoot you.. Violets are blue Roses are red You made me angry And now you are dead.

whats the worst kind of homework? child abuse

You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

Jeff comes home from a long day at work. As a result he is very tired. So, he decides to go to bed.

What do you say to a confused blond? You help her with her conundrum.

who needs to get a different hairstyle to his boyo? josh roberts

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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