You know what's funnier than 24? .... 9-11

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What happened when the wife refused to make her husband a sandwich? Since he was paralyzed from the neck down, he starved to death.

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If life gives you lemons, throw them at people.

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Rosie are red velvet blue I made eggs just for you

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A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

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*Click* "Hello you have reached a pre-recorded voice at the suicide hotline. We regret to inform you that our consultant has suffered a recent bout of depression due to the sheer volume of calls he has received." "His body was found this morning, hanging from a tree." [L]

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Q: Why did the boy cross the road? A: Because he was getting chased by a pedophile

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Q: What does a baby look like in a microwave? A: I don't know, I don't masturbate with my eyes open.

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Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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Caramel Boing.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

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Hey I just met you, and your f$#king crazy,I ate your pizza, so go get me another one!!

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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So, there was two successful business men at a social gathering when one leans in to the other to comment, "Hey, that women over there, she looks like your wife!" to which the other one replies, "That is my wife."

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Q. Why did my ass feel so sweaty? A. Because i was exercising and suckn on some nips.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

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Yo mama's so fat, she weighs over 400 pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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