Where did Suzie go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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A casual web surfer logs onto a website and reads half a joke.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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What happened to the man who jumped off a building? He got hit by a bus on the way down.

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It's yellow and you'll die when it comes into your eye. A taxi.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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What does a white man say when you slug him in the face with a club. Ow.

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When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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None of the sex jokes are not funny or not funny. They're just inappropriate.

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Bob

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Q: Why did the grand mother drop her cane? A: She got pused out a window.

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This is an anti-anti joke. I don't expect him to get it.

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what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

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Hey, do you wanna hear a joke? A joke.

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whats 2=2? gonorrhea.

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a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

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Q: Why was the gorrilla arrested? A: He broke a law.

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A gay man watches football.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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