Why didn't Joe catch the baseball? He got shot by a local gang.

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What did the Jew say when he walked into a bar? Ouch!

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Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

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what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

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If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

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Why is an elephant big, gray and lumpy? Because if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Asprin.

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When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

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A man penetrates another man.

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what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the bird say to the other bird? Nothing because birds can't talk.

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What do Wal-Mart and Michael Jackson have in common? They both have made a lot of money and are also well known around the world.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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Immigration Laws

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what do you call a room with no people in it? empty What do you call a room with over 9000 people in it? a fire hazard

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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Sir, your wife is dead

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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Nero? As In Nero7? Septimus? Where you not killed during the raid? I read you got tortured and killed by your own out of mercy.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

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What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops