So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

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Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

josh roberts makes nuns hang themselves

Billy was taking a stroll in the forest, when suddenly he met a bear. Billy remember what his father had taught him, and quikly lied down on the ground, pretending to be dead. The bear started licking Billy's face. Still he remained calm. The bear bit off Billys finger. Still he did not move. When the bear ate Billy's foot, he nearly panicked. But thinking of his wife and children he mustered his last remaining strenght, and did not move a muscle. If he tried to run or fight the bear he would surely die and never see them again. Then the bear ate Billys head.

How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

What do blueberries, oranges, watermelons, doors, curtains, backpacks, spoons, asian men, bicycles, asian men on bicycles, shrimp, books, eagles, dinosaurs, watermelons wearing backpacks filled with shrimp and orange spoons, feet, limes, binders, paper, candles, chicken nuggets, tvs, chairs, floors, refridgerators, and humidifiers have in common? Barnes and Noble

A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

What did the bartender say when the black man walked into the bar? Hello, what would you like to drink?

Jingle bells, jingle bells SHIT MY FOOT

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

why did rhys jones get shot. because he was there

how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

what is worse than a joke? an anti-joke.

What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

Kittens are orange, puppies are grey, and they both make good pets

Man: Excuse me sir, is this where I turn in my library book? Farmer: You must be really lost, this is a farm.

Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

Which is the smallest? A. Jupiter B. Whale C. Cow D. Bracelet Answer: D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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