Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

How do you fit 94 jews in a volkswagon? two in the front, three in the back, and 89 in the ash tray

What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

Why was the boy crying? Because his dad comes home drunk every night and beats him.

yo mamas so poor she should probably consider finding a job

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

what's black and hangs from a tree in my garden? a blackberry

Why did the fish but the house Because it wanted to eat the house

an american an asian and a jihadist got on a train where did they go no where as the jihadist was strapped to c4

What is big, red, and eats rocks? A big red rock eater,

what did the murderer say when he lost his gun? dangit. now i cant kill anyone

What's sadder then a dead puppy? 2 dead puppies.

Why did the little boy cry? Because he was badly burnt in a house fire.

i killed my family

I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

What happened to the alcoholic? He got liver cancer

roses are red violets are blue I have a knife stand by the door

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? the wheelchair

What do you call an asian who celebrates Christmas? A christan

Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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