do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Knock knock. Who's there? Potatoes. Potatoes who? Garlic salt.

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What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

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Why is McDonalds bad for you? Because their is so much fat in all its products, and contains many calories.

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Q: What do you call a Polish astronomer? A: Copernicus.

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If i knew people where coming i would have trimed my antlers

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

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Boy: "But I don't wanna visit Grandma!" Mother: "Shut up and keep digging."

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Q: y does obama keep raising gas prices A: he dosent want anyone to be able to drive to the poles in november

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a man walks into a bar and was arrested because it wasn't a bar it was a bank and he shot and killed 4 people during the armed robbery

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Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

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A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

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What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

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Santa isn't real

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You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

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person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

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I told my two lesbian friends I wanted to join them. I am a priest in a Gay Marriage friendly state and they are happily married.

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alex is cool

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

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Why is Andrew sleeping? Because he took and overdose on sleeping pills, he probably died in his sleep.

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Knock-Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops