What do you call Justin Bieber's assassin? A hero doing a noble favor to the community.

How are you doing today? I'm fine...Except for the rape.

Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

Why did the chicken cross the road? AIDs.

My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I'm not creative Roses are Blue

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

You know what the stupidest country in the world is? Equatorial Guinea

A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

Why did they use the phone as a football? Because it was a phone-ball.

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

Two Christians are on their way to church. They stay for prayers and have a lovely lunch.

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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