Why did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Because you touch yourself at night

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

What's better than 24-year-olds? Twenty 4-year-olds.

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin get in the car.

Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

why did the man beat his wife? why not?

A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

"hey bro" "WHATS UP" "nothin..... I heard you had your first bj yesterday." "YEAH!!" "how'd it taste?" ........

How do you kill somebody? A: I don't know, I'm not a murderer.

What's the different between a blond and a brunette? Blondes taste better when cut into small pieces and fried in a skillet.

A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

Did you know? that if you were to stretch out all your organs to see how far theyd stretch? youd die.

hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

Why did the guy jump out of the plane? he was parachuting

Where can you find the best black man soup? I don't know. Cannibilism is no longer socially acceptable.

Why did thw chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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