What did the contestant say to the game show host? If I don't win I will arrange to kill your family.

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In Soviet Russia, millions die under an oppressive and uncaring regime that uses communism to justify its inhumane policies.

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Presidents are black Rappers are white Welcome to 2011

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A cat playing laser tag.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

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What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

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What did the Jew get for Christmas ....... An ashtray

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What did the blonde say to the brunette? I just ate a chicken panini.

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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I drive in driveways. I recite in recitals. I play in plays. I park on parkways. My greenhouse is green. And my boxing ring is round. Why does everyone think I'm weird??

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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How did Hellen Keller eat her meals? With a fork.

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Little Anny fell on a sidewalk. Why isn't she crying? 'Cause I've thrown her out off the tenth floor.

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What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If Beauty Exits ... The Heck Are You?

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How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

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What is the quickest way to speed up your 70 year old husband’s heart rate? Extract of foxglove is a very effective blocker of the parasympathetic nervous system, and since the parasympathetic nervous system is responsible for slowing the heart, this would lead to an increase in heart rate. However, it is very dangerous to use such chemicals without advice, and therefore it is better to seek an examination and, if necessary, a prescription from a qualified GP.

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What happen when a plane crash? Everyone on it died...

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Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

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how do you delete your joke off anti-joke? you don't.

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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In the time it has taken you to read this, a small African child has died.

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a man walks into a bar and it hurts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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