A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

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What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

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Rachel: Wanna hear a conundrum? Robby: Sure! Racheal: Vampire Value card.

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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if got a joke if fogot it

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What's the difference between a bird and a wheel? They both fly, I lied about the wheel.

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Why is Evan short? He was born that way.

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I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

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What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

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your so homosexual you go to a gay bar every couple of weeks so you get the social acceptance you need.

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once, my friend said hi. i said hi back

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.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

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Katniss: Don't worry Prim, your not getting picked for the reaping this year! Effie: First Tribute, Primrose Everden! Katniss: Oh sh*t.

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Old McDonald had a farm. He grew corn there, and got reasonably wealthy. Then he retired to the Bahamas.

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What did the blind girl say? Its dark in here.

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? Just in case he gets a hole in one! -LEts Go Mets P.S the comment below is also very stupid

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Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

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A boy asks a wolf, "whats the time mr wolf?" The wolf does not answer. Wolves possess neither watches, nor the neurone in their brain required to talk.

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What's the difference between a trash can full of dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

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so the weather's nice...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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