how did the man with the gun die? obesity

Q: What did the gun say to the person. A: Bang.

I like my coffee the way I like Christina Aguilera - I don't.

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead!!!!

BIG MAC'S

What do you call a black Decepticon? Niggatron. What Pokemon is black? Niggachu. What lives in the sewers, eats pizza and is black? Teenage Mutant Nigga Turtles. What is Disney's most racist children's book? Winnie the Pooh and Nigger Too.

Why do all asians all look alike? Because they do.

The way I see it, there are two types of people. Some are female and some a male.

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

Why couldn't Lucy get her driver's license? Because she has Cerebral Palsy!

Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, your child has been in a terrible car accident.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

An amputee walks into a bar with a big smile on his face and sits down. The bartender looks over at him and asks "So why are you so happy?" The amputee doesn't answer because he has been completely deaf, blind and mute since birth.

You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

A chicken walks into McDonalds. He never comes out because he got grilled, greased, and seasoned.

Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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