So the priest took the 6 year old boy into the confessional...and He told him to say 3 Hail Mary's.

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Q:Whats worse than stubbing your toe? A: Watching a terrorist saw your dads arm off.

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun. He then clocks in and takes duty because he is a security guard at the bank.

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what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Is it true that curiousity killed the cat? No, I hit it multiple times with a baseball bat

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Whats more ugly then seeing a raccoon and a frog f*cking Your mom

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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A. Ask me if I am a tree B. Are you a tree? A. No idiot

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Why did the chair fall off the cliff? Well it is an inamitate object so it did not move itself, someone must have threw it

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Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

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roses are red violets are blue i killed your family

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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A dog walks into a forest and sees a whale. The dog asks "aren't you supposed to be in the ocean?" The whale replies, "yes."

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A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

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If a chicken and a half lays an egg and half in a half of a day how long does it take a monkey with a peg leg to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle?

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Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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How does a chubby baby eat his chili In a very chubby way with his hands smearing it all over is face

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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