Are you kidding? If you can slow down time when stressed, then that means that your perception of time is, well... Oh relative, but still wow! What about now though? Can you do it? And for curiosity`s sake, what if you jumped off a roof? Would the stress make it all really slow?

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? The latter has two additional letters added to the beginning.

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What do you call a Mexican guy in America? A Mexican American

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A chinese man walks into a kitten store. He is a nice man in search of a companion.

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What's funny about cheese? Nothing.

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What did the homosexual give in his secret box? important papers from work.

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Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Face...tastes like chicken!

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What do you call a cow with no legs A cow with no legs.

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You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

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What's similar about a fish and an eagle? They can both fly, except for the fish.

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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What's long and black? A 12 inch black dick.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? Because it was disabled.

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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A unicorn, a smart blonde, a dragon, and a hobo are in a maze who gets out first? The hobo. The other 3 don't exist. By Adam Chebali

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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your momma is so fat that she should be worried about her higher risk of heart disease, diabetes, and ugliness.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops