Knock, Knock! Who's there? Hatch! Hatchoo! Bless you!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses-are-red violets-are-blue Justin's-for -me Not-for-u if-by-chance u-take-my-place I'll-grad-fist &-smash-ur-face

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the taxi driver say to the chicken when the chicken called a cab? "aren't you supposed to be crossing a road somewhere?" Little did the taxi driver know that the chickens license was taken away for multiple DUIs because when his wife left him he became an alcoholic mess, lost his job and became depressed. But when he called the taxi, he was on his way to a job interview. Since he never made it to his job interview he soon went broke and lost his home. Having hit rock bottom, the chicken unawarely started to cross a busy road and was ran over by that same taxi driver.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There are two muffins in the oven. The first says to the other, "Its getting hot in here." The second, befuddled, replies, "AHH! A talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the retarded kid get for chrismas? Nothing the orphanage could not afford to give presents to all of the retarded children

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? - "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats blue and flufft Answer: Blue Fluff

thumb_up thumb_down -16

im jackson, i have a small willy, and like to finger my dog

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why can't Lake Mossman find his penis? Because he's a fat ass, and he doesn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is a baby chick after 9 days old? 10 days old.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

If a tree falls in the forrest and a women hears it does it make a sound? Why is there a tree in the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

This is an anti-joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, whereas Michael Jackson was a singer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why was the black kid made fun of at school? Because he was a nerdy boy who drinks tea

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops