What did the doctor tell his patient? Unfortunately you have cancer.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple ? Finding an apple in your worm !!! ... Wait, what ?

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Simon says, "I'll give you a five second head start before I mow you down with my AK47."

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Q. What happened to the kid with 1 arm and 1 leg and 1 arm and 1 leg A. He had a seisure, then got hit by a bus

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why bouriquet laugh ? cause hes mom get hit by a bus.

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two kids find a condom so they decide to show their mum the mum snatched it off them saying never to touch one of them again the kids went to their room "Mum sounded pretty angry about that thing "Lucky we didnt tell her about the yohgurt we drank out of it

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A man walks into a bar holding a magic lamp. The bartender asks "what are you holding?" The man says "It's a magic lamp." The bartender looks at the man and scratches his head. It turns out the bartender has had a problem with lice in his hair. If you believe in a magic genie is going to grant any wishes you're reading the wrong story. Anyways, the bartender buys medicated shampoo and no longer has head lice. The guy with the magic lamp was totally worthless.

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Why do the children cry at dinner time? Becuase there mother forces them to eat her own faeces and takes pictures of them doing it and posts it on the internet.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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The WNBA

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What did the T-REX say to the Yettie? This is a highly improbable situation, therefore there is no need for an answer.

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What goes 100 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

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What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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How do you save a drowning Asian teenage boy? You get him out of the water.

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what did the man say after he fell off the cliff nothing, he's dead

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What do you call a full refrigerator? A freezer

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ask me if im a tree are you a tree? yes.

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Why din't Santa come to Timmy's house? Timmy died 6 months ago. :(

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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