If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

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Is your Alzheimers getting better? I have alzeimers?...

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

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Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

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There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

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whats the difference between blue and green? there different colours.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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Guy A walks into a bar and sits down beside guy B, they quickly spark up a quick conversation about golf, Guy B says "i hit the ball so hard, it soared 200 yards", Guy A quickly responds by saying "I hit your mom so hard!" Guy B responds "the jokes on you, my mom has herpes"

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Q: How do you make a plumber cry? A: Murder his family

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? They are different species... do i really need to explain the difference??

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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What did the bank teller say after the man asked for a pen? Would you prefer black or blue?

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a tiger swims into the indian ocen and eats a tuna. the tiger shortly dies

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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Why did the 18 year old girl take her clothes off? To take a shower

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Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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